Garments of Mourning

Every day is a gift from God. I still believe this is true. It's perfectly human to stop for a moment and have a good cry. Remembering someone who changed your life for the better. It's not however a good idea to pop up a tent and start a camp fire and make this your new home. No sirree! I admit to being a bit stuck. Anniversary dates get me. I almost posted a play by play of our day on that fateful April Fools Day in 2003. God and I have gone round and round since last night. I have been slowly doing a bible study book on Ruth called, "Loss, Love and Legacy" by Kelly Minter. It's powerful stuff. This morning God used the words I needed to hear. He got my heart today. It's been a long time since He got my heart. I haven't let Him near it. I've been afraid to He wasn't safe anymore. Today I share with you her words, Kelly's words. She is talking about Ruth, the widow and how she puts on "new" garments for Boaz. She had to cast off her garments of mourning. The rest is from her book, it is in quotations. "Though many of us have not experienced the unspeakable and incomprehensible tragedy of losing a spouse or someone we love deeply, we have known a time when God asked us to take off our clothes of mourning, clinging, grasping, wishing, hoping, striving, even praying for something...and move forward. I specifically remember a moment when God made this exact request of me. I had been clinging to the past, hanging on to the last ragged edges of something He had worked hard to move me on from. It was time for me to move forward without my mourning clothes. Here's the deal: When we're wrapped in garments of mourning, we're unavailable for whatever else God has for us. In a sense, we take ourselves out of the game. Please know that if you have walked Ruth's exact journey of a dire loss, I am not at all presuming on your grieving process. My simple hope is when God has held us, healed us, and lifted our heads, that we'd be ready to move forward with Him; and though our hearts may always ache, we won't stay in our mourning clothes forever. Do you sense that God is asking you to throw off some weighty garments? Unforiveness, bitterness, anger, discontentment, jealousy, mourning or anything else that might be keeping you in a stagnant place?" Can you believe how God showed up today? I believe every one of you who prayed for me had a part in this, don't believe for a minute your prayers aren't working. My blog is for you and I hope the words God gave me, He also gave you. That you will be moved by them. Stagnant is the perfect word to describe what my life has been like these past four years. But today I KNOW God wants me to take off my clothes of mourning and begin to live the life He has for me. I don't know what that looks like but today I gave my heart back to Him. It's a good day, Praise God.